Book Brief – The Gap and The Gain

book brief Jan 08, 2024
Charis Santillie sitting in a cozy chair with a book and her dog Heidi on her lap - looking to the side where it says Book Brief and shows a photo of the cover of the book The Gap and the Gain by Dan Sullivan and Dr. Benjamin Hardy
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🎧 👉 Prefer audio? You can also listen to me share about this in podcast episode #091 here.

In our pursuit of success and fulfillment, many of us find ourselves trapped in a never-ending cycle of chasing external achievements and measuring ourselves against an idealized future version.

But what if there was another way? A path that leads to true inner peace and lasting satisfaction? Today I'm diving into the concepts explored in the book The Gap and The Gain (Amazon affiliate link) by Dan Sullivan and Dr. Benjamin Hardy, offering a summarized version of the key takeaways and discussing how they can be applied to your life.

The Gap: Measuring Forward, Chasing Perfect Ideals

One of the central themes in this book is the distinction between the GAP and the GAIN. The GAP represents the constant comparison and measurement of ourselves against a future ideal, the achievements of others, or the pursuit of external validation. While setting goals and envisioning a brighter future is important, constantly living in the GAP can lead to feelings of inadequacy, the need to catch up, and a constant chase for the next accomplishment.

The Gain: Measuring Backward, Embracing Growth

On the other hand, the GAIN invites you to measure yourself against your own past progress and accomplishments. Rather than constantly chasing an elusive future, measuring backward helps you recognize and appreciate how far you've come. It encourages you to view setbacks and challenges as opportunities for growth and learning, ultimately leading to a greater sense of fulfillment and satisfaction.

Redefining Success in Connection with Inner Fulfillment

The Gap and The Gain challenges the traditional definition of success, highlighting the importance of internal satisfaction and emotional well-being over external accolades. Success, in its truest form, is an inside job — it is deeply connected to your emotions and how you feel about yourself. The book encourages you to prioritize your own inner peace and authenticity. I connect this with full self-expression as you find joy and fulfillment in the present moment.

The Power of Acknowledgments in Shifting Perspectives

A key aspect discussed in the book closely aligns with the Fearless Living principle of acknowledgments. (As a Certified Fearless Living Coach & Trainer, I love connecting concepts back to my foundational coaching principles.) Acknowledging your wins, progress, and small steps toward growth is essential in rewiring your brain to recognize the positive aspects of your life. By training yourself to see where you have moved forward, you can cultivate a more positive outlook and reduce the constant need to chase the future. Acknowledgments also extend to relationships, as you learn to appreciate and acknowledge the growth of those around you.

Freedom over Fear

Fear plays a significant role in keeping us trapped in the GAP. Fear of not being enough, fear of failure, and fear of disappointing others often lead to unrealistic expectations and constant comparison. The concepts in this book advocate for a shift toward freedom — freedom from fear and self-imposed limitations. By recognizing your fears, embracing vulnerability, and reframing your thinking, you can step into your true potential and experience greater confidence, happiness, and true inner success.

The Gap and The Gain offers a powerful framework for reevaluating your approach to success and fulfillment. By shifting your perspective and embracing the GAIN, measuring backward instead of constantly chasing the future, you can find more inner peace, joy, and lasting satisfaction. This book serves as a guide for high achievers who seek a more fulfilling and authentic life, encouraging them to prioritize emotional well-being and personal growth. So, join the journey of discovering your true potential and cherishing every moment of your life.


“The way to measure your progress is backward against where you started, not against your ideal.” 

– Dan Sullivan

🎧 👉 Prefer audio? You can also listen to me share about this in podcast episode #091 here.

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